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Dogs & Kids
Dogs are not Human Beings
Although Hollywood and television often portray dogs with human thoughts, values and even words, it is important to remember that your dog is a dog, not a person. Dogs have different needs than humans do. One important element in a dog's life is his need for a pack hierarchy. Your family is now your dog's pack and you (the adult family member(s)) must be your dog's pack leader (the alpha). Without this leadership, your dog may try to assume leadership and not only become an obnoxious mutt, but will try to "run your children" which can (and often does) lead to disastrous results.
The first thing you must do to assume leadership with your dog is take your dog to obedience school. An ill behaved dog is a threat to your children, plain and simple. You cannot control your dog around your children if he doesn't know or won't obey basic obedience commands.
The next thing you must do is set some house rules (e.g. no begging, no jumping on people or furniture, no chewing, etc.). Include your children in setting these rules so that they know what the dog is allowed to do and what it is not. Consistency is very important. Everyone must agree and hold the dog to the same set of rules. Inconsistency (Mom says it's OK, Dad says it isn't) will confuse the dog and lead to behavior problems. Teach your dog the rules by firmly but gently disciplining him for breaking them and lovingly praising appropriate behavior.
Age Stages--Do's and Don'ts
Dogs interact with children differently depending on the child's age. The following is a description of the different "age stages" and some do's and don'ts for each stage.
Under 2
Children under the age of two really aren't aware of the dog as a real presence. Although they may talk to the dog and call it by name, the dog doesn't really mean any more to it than a stuffed animal. At this age the dog considers the child a potential littermate. This can be an issue if the dog feels at all rejected because of the arrival of the child into the home (see the section on "Introducing a New Arrival").
Do's
Supervision is mandatory whenever the child and dog are together. Dogs should not be trusted with an infant unsupervised, remember they can unintentionally hurt them just playing. Playpens are a very useful tool to separate dog and infant.
Teach your dog to take food only from the palm of the left hand, so that he is not snagging food from the baby.
Reward your dog with gentle praise or small treats for tolerating toddler play (patting, crawling around him, etc.)
As your child enters toddler-hood begin teaching him appropriate ways of interacting with the dog (petting vs. hitting). Separate the child from the dog if play gets too rough or your dog seems ill at ease.
Don'ts
Don't relegate your dog to the backyard. He is a family member and deserves and needs to be with you. Time in the backyard while your child is playing around the house is fine, but when the child is napping or you are free to supervise, bring the dog in.
Don't bar your dog from the nursery. Teach him to come in and hold a down-stay. Barring him from the nursery can create jealousies.
Ages 2-7
At this age, children view the dog as a "funny thing" which competes for Mom's and Dad's attention. They also begin to see the dog as a friend. The dog still views the child as a littermate. You can expect a lot of ear pulling and tail yanking with children of this age. Your dog should be willing to tolerate a little of this, but don't expect him to become your child's punching bag.
Do's
Monitor all interactions between the dog and child.
Teach the child appropriate games such as "Fetch" and "Hide and Seek" that he can play with the dog to avoid physical contact and roughness.
Put the dog in a quiet place alone if there are lots of kids over visiting. It is difficult to supervise, and lots of running and screaming can illicit instinctive aggressive displays from some dogs.
Don'ts
Do NOT allow tug-of-war games or wrestling games. This will encourage aggressive displays from your dog.
Don't allow your children to be rough with the dog. "NO" is not enough--show your child how to pet gently and play "fetch" with the dog.
Ages 7-11
This is the age when your children can begin to show leadership with your dog. This is a good time to have your children participate in the care of the dog (feeding, walking, and training). Children of this age make excellent trainers--they are usually more consistent and playful in their training than adults.
Do's
Include your children in obedience training, feeding and walking of the dog. Assign dog chores to children based on interest and ability rather than age or gender. Supervise all activities with groups of children. Too much commotion can be overwhelming to most dogs.
Don'ts
Don't expect your child to take full responsibility for the dog. A dog needs much more time and attention than a child can give. If you (the adult) don't want to accept responsibility, don't get the dog.
Age 11 and up
At this age children become more interested in their own activities than the dog. This is normal and can be expected. However, there is no reason to expect the child loves the dog any less. The child will still rely on the dog, especially during stressful times. The adults in the family should be prepared to give the dog more attention when his favorite child pal starts spending more time with friends and social activities.
Introducing Your New Baby to Your Dog
The homecoming of your first baby is a joyful, hectic, stressful event and one of the concerns is the new baby and the dog. Family members are telling you to get rid of the dog, people are telling you not to let the dog near the baby and others just plain don’t know what to do.
Well, to put your mind at ease, in the majority of cases it is no problem introducing the new baby and the dog. There are some things that you can do to make it easier for all concerned. Lets start with the basics, brush up your obedience. You want the dog to listen to your commands the first time. Push your stays out to at least 15 minutes, there are going to be times when the baby is crying and out of control and you want the dog to be out of the way while you deal with the problem.
Many people are so wrapped up with the new baby coming home that they forget the other family member, the family pet. Look at it this way, if you have a child in the home you would explain that he or she will soon have a little baby brother or sister. You will tell them that things will be changing a little bit and tell them what those changes are. You will help them understand that they are still loved and that the new baby is going to be a friend.
Your pet deserves the same consideration. Great... but how do you tell your cat or dog that you're going to have a baby?
Set up your nursery early, at least three months before your baby is due. Once the crib or play pen is set up, place a toy doll and blanket in the crib or play pen. Go to your public library and borrow a sound effects tape that has the sound of a baby crying on it. Establish the routine that you will be having with the baby and carry the doll around. All these things will help your pet understand what will be happening when the baby comes home. If you haven't already done obedience training with your dog, now is the time. It is also important to let your dog get used to the stroller. Push the stroller around when your dog is near and let him/her get used to walking beside it. If your dog is jumping on you he or she is going to do the same with the baby. If your dog is currently doing this put a stop to it now. Let him or her know this is no longer acceptable. If your dog begins to jump up tell them "NO!", "Sit!" and give lots of praise. It's up to you to educate your pet. If at all possible expose your dog to young children and make it a pleasurable experience. Remember to praise your dog.
The dog’s introduction to the new baby starts prior to bringing the baby home. As you are putting the baby’s room together let the dog watch and show him the things that belong to the baby. Don’t ban the dog from the room, remember he was able to go in there before and he will be curious about all the new stuff. Start getting the dog familiar with the smells of a baby by having him smell things like the baby powder, baby wipes etc. If the dog wants to take or chew the baby’s toys then the time to find out and to correct him is before the baby comes home.
When the baby is born have someone bring a blanket or clothes that the baby has worn home the night before the baby comes home and let the dog smell it and then place it near the dog when he sleeps so that he can start to imprint with the baby’s smell. Some people believe that the dog can tell that this is a human baby and belongs to you, but I think that the dog does not have a clue. It doesn’t act human, sound human or smell human so it is important that the dog starts at the earliest time to imprint with the baby.
Homecoming for the new baby is one of the most important moments for your dog and as the old saying goes your only opportunity to make a good first impression.. This can be a very hectic time because the house may be full of family and friends, DON’T FORGET the dog is excited to see you. You have been gone for a day or two and your coming home is even more stressful for the dog because he doesn’t understand what is going on. Have someone else walk in with the baby and you go immediately to the dog and give it some attention. After you have the dog settled down, sit in a chair and have someone give you the baby, hold the baby in your lap and let the dog see and smell it. Do not hold the baby out for the dog to see because the dog will perceive that you are giving the baby to him and could try to take it. If the dog nuzzles too hard (which can be the dog trying to initiate play) correct with a command to be gentle then have him sit stay and regain his calm. If you see any sign of aggression, growling, hair raised, or nipping confine the dog and call a trainer.
After everyone has left and the baby is quiet, place the dog on a down stay then get down on the floor with the baby and make the dog hold the stay. Spend a little time talking to the dog as you hold the baby and care for the baby.
Remember that each new experience you have with the baby crying, feeding, baths etc. are also new experiences for the dog, let him see what all the fuss is about and not be excluded so that no resentment starts.
Make this the most enjoyable time in all your lives for you have been twice blessed, with the miracle of a new baby and a dog that is devoted to you.
The first few weeks will be a stressful transition period for everyone in the family, including the dog. BE PATIENT! Don't feel you have to accept the dog being under foot all the time, but don't kick him into the backyard for 16 hours at a stretch either. Give him a chance to get used to the new activity, smells and sounds. In two to four weeks, the dog should settle down and feel at ease with the new little one. If not, consult a trainer or behaviorist to determine if there are underlying problems. Whatever you do, don't panic and scream at the dog. Chances are if the dog isn't behaving itself it's your own fault--the dog needs more training!
If you are really concerned have a trainer there when the baby comes home to observe the dog and handle the situation. If over the next few days you see anything that may concern you call a trainer you trust and ask their advice.
